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Getting off social media is like not being invited to a party you never wanted to go to.

Midwinter means lane-shrinkage. Thanks to snow accumulation, two-lane streets become one-lane streets. One-way streets become no-way streets. The result is the automotive version of the February blahs, a situation that can bring out unseemly aspects of the human character.

At first, shop and restaurant owners worried that the pedestrian-only zones would be bad for business. This doesn’t seem to be the case. These areas are crowded with people enjoying a customary evening passeggiata (from “passegiare” which means “to stroll”). They stay busy late into the evening, window-shopping and going for supper.

I never had a minivan crisis. I’ve driven a Dodge Grand Caravan since 2005 and fail to understand the anxiety. I always expected to one day become a dad and I always expected, as soon as the metamorphosis was complete, to become a sock-and-sandal-wearing doofus embarrassment. And I was right.

If you’re visiting Rome and eager to drive around the Eternal City, it’s best to follow one simple rule – don’t. Don’t do it. The Metro covers most of the city, taxis are readily available, Uber now has a foothold and Rome is extremely walkable. Driving in Rome will test you in ways you don’t want to be tested. Just say no.

I came to Rome on a pilgrimage, not to the Vatican, but to retrace the locations of Federico Fellini’s 1960 masterpiece, La Dolce Vita. While other visitors swarm the Forum and the Colosseum, I’ve been to the Via Veneto, Cinecitta Studios, the Trevi Fountain and the EUR District looking for insight into one of the most successful foreign films ever made.

I’ve invented a cocktail, a delicious refreshing beverage which I’m sure will alter the course of history. I want to give it to the world but this goes against my nature which says, “find a way to make money.” So, while I perfect it…

You cannot make being a dad cool. It’s impossible. That includes, in the case of the Pacifica, making being uncool hip.

We are getting rid of buttons so we can have touchscreens that feel like buttons.

Orange is back. Orange you glad you can buy an orange car?